Cliché as it sounds, the concept of “keeping a promise” remains a significant factor in terms of how people connect and communicate with each other.
A man’s word of honor is believed to be a life-binding commitment and once a person says “you have my word,” he is taken at par value. Although it is the general rule that having “word of honor” is an admirable trait itself, there are those who take the words “honor” or “my word” lightly. They use their words carelessly and with utter disregard for the full meaning and impact of the word or the commitment that goes with it. Sadly, this is present in every area of our society, in families, communities, businesses and governments.
In an increasingly capitalist and market based-society, written contracts and waivers are crucial to every transaction. Gone are the days when agreements would be sealed with a handshake. Some claim that modern practices have actually helped lessen the worth of word of honor. Particularly, in Philippine society, many say that word of honor or “palabra de honor” isn’t as valued as before. With the advent of mobile technology and social media, relationships have been become more impersonal and distant with less personal and face-to-face interaction. This has led to the degrading value of “palabra de honor”. However, there are some who also say that despite the various cultural and societal influences, “palabra de honor” is still practiced and valued by Filipinos today, yet such assertion is still debatable and remains to be proven.
In Japanese culture, however, this trait is clearly prevalent. Honor and integrity are deemed important and one’s actual word of honor is still weightier than his signature on a piece of paper. My grandpa said that in Japan, if one breaks his promise, he does not only dishonor himself, he dishonors his employee, his colleagues and, more importantly, his family. He is looked upon with distrust and disgust. In fact, sometimes, the effect on the family is so grave that relationships within becomes irreparable. It is apparent, then, that the word of honor is significant in sustaining relationships.
In the Philippines, however, there’s no clear evidence of whether “palabra de honor” is still being practiced by most Filipinos. Skeptics argue that just by observing the politicians in the country, there really is no sense of “palabra de honor” anymore. Rarely do we find politicians who stand by their word. In a country where much cynicism towards politicians is present, political campaigns become jokes and hideous stage dramas, especially now as more showbiz personalities enter the arena. Plans and platforms become empty promises, as politics and elections have become glitzier popularity contests.
There are those who argue that “palabra de honor” is now just considered as a traditional value we inherited from our Spanish colonizers.
During our ancestor’s time, they believed that the proof of one’s manhood or integrity was when he kept his word. Written contracts were unnecessary because they stood behind what they promised. In trades and agreements among “datus” and merchants, a handshake was enough to seal the deal. The “dangal” was valued; the concept that one would rather die than be dishonored is a treasured value. The dignity, honor and prestige of a person are considered as priceless, even more than material wealth. My grandfather said, “in our generation, nobody will respect you if you do not keep your word.” Thus, based on this perspective, one may assume that older generation greatly values “palabra de honor.” In contrast, the degree of importance to such value among the Filipino youth is still a question.
Many say that today, the upbringing of the typical Filipino has changed.
Broken marriages, dysfunctional families, single-parent homes and increasing number of OFW parents are deemed as factors in causing the disregard for one’s word of honor.
According to one of our pastors,"the youth today easily break their word because of various factors such as the parents’ upbringing, lack of values education in schools and plausibly, technology.”
In a post-modern world, wherein traditional communicative values are both valued and disregarded, it is important to retrace these behaviors to improve the relationships – both professional and personal in any society. "Palabra de honor” must be re-examined because it is supposed to be a “good value.”
I personally think that this value must be nurtured, but well, let's see in a few years. #thawtsbecauseimbored
